What is your gender?

[Akhter13]

an English-teaching mother who said in no uncertain terms that an indefinite third party** should be specified with "he" or "she," starting at a pretty young age

Tell her to read Chaucer & Shakespeare, sorry a pedant* [origin 16th century word for teacher] often likes to make up extra rules, maybe it is just to bolster their ego.

Not specifying a gender does make something an it. eg
Before an employee will be considered for promotion they will have to pass a fitness test.
The locum has reviewed your results and they have prescribed an antibiotic.
The chair has read the minutes and they are not happy.

They can be used anytime gender is not an issue, which is like 97% of what we do.

None of this is said to chide, my purpose is to inform and promote discussion.

*it appears to have been 16th century jobsworth teacher who just decided to make this shit up.

**indefinite pronouns one, someone, anyone, etc.; and others) do not make male–female gender distinctions, that is, they are gender-neutral. The only distinction made is between personal and non-personal reference (someone vs. something, who vs. what, etc.).

 

[Tinman]

I can't bring myself to use "their/them" as a singular pronoun. It makes me feel I'm talking about someone with a split personality or happens to be Spiderman's Venom

Sorry to be something of a grammar nazi, but do you mean "they/them"? While I don't suffer from this association of they/them as a plurality I understand it. But "their" is an appropriate possessive pronoun in the singular and I don't usually see people associating it with plurality the same way people do with they and them.

P.S. Anyone else keep etymonline bookmarked for such discussions?

P.P.S. Looking up "their" it appears that they, them, and their all seem to come from Norse plural pronouns to replace old English gendered plural pronouns.

 

[Kesil]

Yes, I do. It was meant as a bit of a joke.

 

[dragontamer8740]

Tell her to read Chaucer & Shakespeare, sorry a pedant* [origin 16th century word for teacher] often likes to make up extra rules, maybe it is just to bolster their ego.

I am fully aware that Shakespeare, etc. used it and it has been in the language for centuries - as is she. But in academic writing it is frowned upon, and she was an academic writer.

Again, I don't personally take issue when I read someone else using it in such a context; I just don't do it myself out of habit.