Children with Captain Khorgan
- Thread starter BortBit
- Start date
And little Unnamed had the perfect villainous backstory going for a moment there, too.
"My dad paid to ravage my mom as part of a prison prostitution program and then they dumped me in some bizarre baby farm without even naming me. I was never going to turn out right but they had no idea how wrong I'd be."
"My dad paid to ravage my mom as part of a prison prostitution program and then they dumped me in some bizarre baby farm without even naming me. I was never going to turn out right but they had no idea how wrong I'd be."
Welcome to the TiTS setting in a nutshell.
You forgot to add "Oh and my mom was totally into dad ravaging her in prison, since he was the one who put who in there to begin with, with parents like these who can blame me?"
Ahem...
Kid!Khorgans: "Daddy, where did we come from?"
AssEgg!Kid: "Oh One, the little dumbasses opened a can of worms....oh...sorry..."
Cockvine!Kid: "Asshole. Oh wait that's home for you."
Captain Steele (Ignoring his offspring): "Well kid, it all began when your mom was going to blow up an already geologically unstable planet in an attempt to get rich by extract a rare metal. I went down and fought a long and gruelling battle against her while she was in a suit of power armour and she tried to blow me up with rockets. All with a ticking clock."
K!K: "....What? Mommy was a maniac?"
CS: "Course, then I destroyed that armour, kicked her ass and defused the bomb. Then I went back and slammed that emerald ass for hours because in the Thraggen culture, I now owned that ass. Ahhhhhh yeah."
AE!K & CV!K: "That's it, I'm outta here."
CS: "Then she was imprisoned in a secret prison in deep space with the rest of her crew and the owners of the prison made me an offer. 1000 credits a pop, I could bang a prisoner and impregnate them. So I popped open the ol' wallet and spent that first weekend taking Red Myr Venom and pounding your mamma like a hammer pounds a nail. Course, then she sent me videos of herself getting off, but that's a story for another day."
K!K: "....."
CS: "......"
K!K: "............."
CS: "Love you!
"
Does it really matter? Especially when there's humour to show how messed up Steele's kids will probably be.
I mean, if the worst Cockvine Kid can say is that their parent ploughed themselves one morning and gave birth to them, they've one up on some of the others.
I mean, if the worst Cockvine Kid can say is that their parent ploughed themselves one morning and gave birth to them, they've one up on some of the others.
Yeah, well Vic was alive for over 200 years and something of a memetic sex god. Its almost certain that Captain Steele has more than one half sibling, some of them probably old enough to be their grandparents. Who knows how many of Vic's kids are out there, but its that certain degree of mystery that adds to the story.
I think it has been specifically stated that Victor has had over 200 children and that is just the ones we know about.
Gonna need a source on that. I don't *doubt* he had that many or more, but not specifically 200+.
PC Steele was literally conceived for the position.
Feel free to add that to the list of shit you'll end up talking to your therapist, whom you pay an obscene amount of credits, about.
Feel free to add that to the list of shit you'll end up talking to your therapist, whom you pay an obscene amount of credits, about.
... Egg on my face, but im honestly not sure where I heard it, only that I have heard it multiple times. However, I'd bet a hundred on it, afterall this is the internet, I wouldnt post unverified facts as truths!
Calling them a winner implies a chance at losing. Given they were conceived for the position, subject to genetic tailoring just after conception, and raised very specifically, I'd say that the game was rigged from the start.
Like all estate situations there's a big legal difference between bastards and legitimate heirs. Steele Jr. is a designer baby conceived for the sole purpose of becoming the Steele Heir/a pseudo-clone of Victor charged with memetically simulating his adventures and accomplishments.