Ello again. In the "Fuck Him" option when first meeting Berwyn, on the second page, "collarbone" should be one word:
When meeting Zhara & her band for the first time, in the appearance page, "wields" should be "wield" ("all ... of them wield"):
On the third green tile to the east in the Foothills, "wont to do" should be "wont to be:"
Ran into Gianna, and when choosing "Leave," I think there's an extra space between "y'self" and "travelers:"
On the purple tile north of the Foothills waystone, the second sentence is hard to follow. "This spot" is repeated twice in this sentence, I would cut the second "on this spot," and "for one" after "elevation:"
When meeting the manticore girl, I'm not entirely sure what "tent" means here... her dick? Is it supposed to be "tent pole?" Or maybe "tent in her clothes"--? Tent itself is just something made of cloth, so I'm not entirely sure if it's her cock:
In the "Fuck Vag" option, the "you" in the first sentence should be uncapitalized:
LOL--if the PC has a small cock, there should be a comma before "assuming," in the fourth paragraph:
When meeting Zhara & her band for the first time, in the appearance page, "wields" should be "wield" ("all ... of them wield"):
On the third green tile to the east in the Foothills, "wont to do" should be "wont to be:"
Ran into Gianna, and when choosing "Leave," I think there's an extra space between "y'self" and "travelers:"
On the purple tile north of the Foothills waystone, the second sentence is hard to follow. "This spot" is repeated twice in this sentence, I would cut the second "on this spot," and "for one" after "elevation:"
When meeting the manticore girl, I'm not entirely sure what "tent" means here... her dick? Is it supposed to be "tent pole?" Or maybe "tent in her clothes"--? Tent itself is just something made of cloth, so I'm not entirely sure if it's her cock:
In the "Fuck Vag" option, the "you" in the first sentence should be uncapitalized:
LOL--if the PC has a small cock, there should be a comma before "assuming," in the fourth paragraph: