Combat > Loss >Facesitting
1. Should probably remove 'the'.
2. Should be 'fragrance' or add something else like 'fragrant scent'.
3. 'Mother Earth' would be capitalized. Having said that, I don't think Mother Earth or even Earth really fits the setting (obviously 'earth' just meaning the ground is fine). But this isn't really the place for that, otherwise I would have suggested Mother Savarra or just Savarra ('Mother Earth' might be fine as a [silly]), but regardless... Mother Earth or Earth would be capitalizedas you're personifying the Earth, just like Mother Nature.
4. Technically it's 'done well' not 'done good', but I doubt anyone really care too much. I wouldn't even mention except for the other minor typos to address.
5. 'Small' shouldn't be capitalized.
Combat > Loss >Suckle and Bang
6. Should be 'She'
7. There's an extra space here.
1. Should probably remove 'the'.
2. Should be 'fragrance' or add something else like 'fragrant scent'.
3. 'Mother Earth' would be capitalized. Having said that, I don't think Mother Earth or even Earth really fits the setting (obviously 'earth' just meaning the ground is fine). But this isn't really the place for that, otherwise I would have suggested Mother Savarra or just Savarra ('Mother Earth' might be fine as a [silly]), but regardless... Mother Earth or Earth would be capitalizedas you're personifying the Earth, just like Mother Nature.
4. Technically it's 'done well' not 'done good', but I doubt anyone really care too much. I wouldn't even mention except for the other minor typos to address.
5. 'Small' shouldn't be capitalized.
Combat > Loss >Suckle and Bang
6. Should be 'She'
7. There's an extra space here.
Last edited: