Another victory scene for the Goblin Succubus. Feedback's welcome and appreciated!
-edited as of 7/9
-edited as of 7/9
Last edited:
Goblin Succubus Anal
- Thread starter Rico
- Start date
I read through it. No typos, just a few punctuation notes, mostly commas. The dialogue doesn't have to be expressly italicized, since I believe it gets done automatically. Other than that, just do a search for common words like 'cock' or 'pucker' and make sure you switch them up so they aren't overused.
"I lost that a long time ago," she admits, fixing you with one eye and going right into seductress mode. "But you can still play with the box it came in."]
I've been saving that one.
[silly|"What?" you tease. "Not gonna offer me your cherry on top?"
"I lost that a long time ago," she admits, fixing you with one eye and going right into seductress mode. "But you can still play with the box it came in."]
I've been saving that one.
Last edited:
Really appreciate the time you put into the suggestions and offering up your own writing's above and beyond. I'll start editing once I get a few spare hours!I read through it. No typos, just a few punctuation notes, mostly commas. The dialogue doesn't have to be expressly italicized, since I believe it gets done automatically. Other than that, just do a search for common words like 'cock' or 'pucker' and make sure you switch them up so they aren't overused.
[silly|"What?" you tease. "Not gonna offer me your cherry on top?"
"I gave my virginity away a long time ago," she admits, fixing you with one eye and going right into seductress mode. "But you can play with the box it came in."]
I've been saving that one.
