Writer's Block/Personal Anxiety

[TiefTheTiefling]

First Thing's First

This ain't a cry for attention or anything like that, I'm simply looking for some advice from some of the more confidently creative out there as I'm personally struggling to sit and write out anything longer than three paragraphs without scrapping it due to it not being up to my personal standards. I knew no better place to post this (and I'm shit with forums because I've never really used them before) so I figured throwing it in general would perhaps be the safest place for it. Apologies if I'm wrong though.

Continuing Onward

As stated above, I'm finding it very difficult to actually actively sit and write for extended periods of time. I believe that in part it's due to my lack of patience in some matters - as I'm told I often expect instantaneous results or at the very least, quick ones; that being said I also begin to feel rather ill as I get further in alongside quite a genuinely sickening discomfort resulting in me not wanting to show the work to anyone. That all eventually leads to me being quite a lil' bitch and deleting the work I've done, no matter how extensive it is or otherwise.

I just want to know from the others that undoubtedly get cold feet whilst writing: Do you have any tips or steps I can take to improve my confidence and/or a way for me to become more comfortable with my writing overall?

I've tried to overcome the strange feelings of anxiety brewed by trying to write my own work but it all ends in the same way, discomfort and waste of effort. Any help at all would be greatly appreciated, I don't expect a miracle solution. Just a tip or two to help me overcome how much of a wuss I am.

Thanks in advance.

 

[BubbleLord]

I write something else.

I mean, it sounds kinda dumb I guess? But I've never effectively had writer's block because when I hit the wall with something I work on something else for a bit and come back to it. It generally isn't so much a "muse loss" or anything as much as I've found I gain muse to freshen things up and reinvigorate storytelling. RPing, for me, was something that has always helped expand and push me to writing more and generally without much error. It's probably why I generally have a good turnover time with things I write.

Now, as for cold feet? I mean... really it's just about writing and knowing that it might suck but that's okay. It's only going to hurt you if you think someone is a jerk for saying so; the best writers are the ones who develop thick skin early and just boldly take leaps. Bad ideas can be jumped off of, but run them until you feel that you've run a bad ideas best you can if you want. It's all about trying to encourage yourself into writing and honestly not giving zero fucks about stupid hate and taking the GOOD hate (the critical hate) in strides.

I've RP'd in writing format for basically 17-18ish years and honestly have held this to my heart for a long time. It wasn't until I started taking plunges more in the later years that I really saw myself grow as a writer and as a story-creator. The best growth is taken when you're confident enough to just take a few hits. IF your writing is bad, then it's bad; but you can't improve if you don't know that.

 

[TiefTheTiefling]

I write something else.

I mean, it sounds kinda dumb I guess? But I've never effectively had writer's block because when I hit the wall with something I work on something else for a bit and come back to it. It generally isn't so much a "muse loss" or anything as much as I've found I gain muse to freshen things up and reinvigorate storytelling. RPing, for me, was something that has always helped expand and push me to writing more and generally without much error. It's probably why I generally have a good turnover time with things I write.

Now, as for cold feet? I mean... really it's just about writing and knowing that it might suck but that's okay. It's only going to hurt you if you think someone is a jerk for saying so; the best writers are the ones who develop thick skin early and just boldly take leaps. Bad ideas can be jumped off of, but run them until you feel that you've run a bad ideas best you can if you want. It's all about trying to encourage yourself into writing and honestly not giving zero fucks about stupid hate and taking the GOOD hate (the critical hate) in strides.

I've RP'd in writing format for basically 17-18ish years and honestly have held this to my heart for a long time. It wasn't until I started taking plunges more in the later years that I really saw myself grow as a writer and as a story-creator. The best growth is taken when you're confident enough to just take a few hits. IF your writing is bad, then it's bad; but you can't improve if you don't know that.

To be honest, I didn't expect such a lengthy response. A lot of what you've said here does make a lot of sense and I do think that I need to develop a thicker skin. I worry too much about what others will think rather than about my personal opinions when it comes to the writing in general. I've also never truly shared my writing with those who could make a critical analysis so I suppose I feel like I possibly haven't been given the chance to improve yet? Just speculation. Regardless, I really appreciate you taking the time to respond and I'll try to take as much as what you've said here to heart.

Again, I appreciate it greatly.

 

[Slab Bulkhead]

Hi. I'm Slab. I'm going to tell you some things I've learned from writing regularly for a long damn time, and there's going to be lots of swearing.

First things first: when you start writing, you are going to suck at it. Everybody does. I've known a lot of writers, and every single one of us has tales of our early fuck-ups, the stuff we wrote that was just goddamn horrible. But if you want to write, what matters is that A: you accept that, and B: you don't let it stop you. To write, you have to get used to putting the thoughts and images in your head into concrete words and putting them down on paper in a way that other people who read them can understand what you mean. It sounds simple, but in reality, it's fucking hard.

I hear you on expecting instant or quick results. To put it simply: stop that. Writing takes time to do, and it takes a lot of time to get good at it. If you feel like what you're writing now isn't up to your standards, that's fine. Nobody starts off amazing, and the only way to get better is to keep at it. If you look at what you've done, and think it sucks, then remind yourself that it's all part of learning, and that you'll do better next time. If you keep trying, if you learn from what you've done and figure out what works and what doesn't and how to make what's on the page better match what's in your head, then you will get better. And there's no time limit on any of this, so there's always going to be a next time if you want there to be.

If you just want to write for yourself, then no worries, have at it and enjoy it. But it sounds like you don't just want to write, you also want to be read. Far as I've seen, most writers do. And I understand feeling like what you've written is something you wouldn't show to anyone, and how discouraging that can be. Wanting to get better is good - if you start off thinking your work is incredible, odds are really good it's horrible. Feeling like you suck at writing is a big step toward getting better, since the only way to get better is to learn where you need to improve. So congrats, you're doing it right.

I also hear you on throwing away your work if you don't think it's up to your standards. To put it simply again: stop that. One of the biggest ways to get better is to edit what you've already done, to see what you did and figure out what works and what doesn't and make the changes to make it what you want it to be. And you can't do that if you delete everything you write because you think it sucks. Also, it might not suck! It's really damn easy to stop in the middle of a page or a paragraph or a sentence and say "fuck it all", but sometimes you go back to your work and find that it's not as bad as you thought.

Also: what's in your head will never perfectly match what you put on the page. This is another thing I've seen a ton of writers talk about. It's really easy to have an amazing idea, and when you try to write it out, it feels like a jumbled clusterfuck and all the awesome that got you to start writing it is nowhere to be found. That's normal. That's first draft stuff. In a case like that, the best you can do is go over your work and make the changes you need to bring it closer to what you first thought up. Nothing comes out perfect the first time, but you have to get it on the page before you can make it better. You can fix shit writing, you can't fix writing that doesn't exist.

Not sure what else to say, but I hope this helps. And one more thing:


Good luck.

 

[TiefTheTiefling]

Hi. I'm Slab. I'm going to tell you some things I've learned from writing regularly for a long damn time, and there's going to be lots of swearing.

First things first: when you start writing, you are going to suck at it. Everybody does. I've known a lot of writers, and every single one of us has tales of our early fuck-ups, the stuff we wrote that was just goddamn horrible. But if you want to write, what matters is that A: you accept that, and B: you don't let it stop you. To write, you have to get used to putting the thoughts and images in your head into concrete words and putting them down on paper in a way that other people who read them can understand what you mean. It sounds simple, but in reality, it's fucking hard.

I hear you on expecting instant or quick results. To put it simply: stop that. Writing takes time to do, and it takes a lot of time to get good at it. If you feel like what you're writing now isn't up to your standards, that's fine. Nobody starts off amazing, and the only way to get better is to keep at it. If you look at what you've done, and think it sucks, then remind yourself that it's all part of learning, and that you'll do better next time. If you keep trying, if you learn from what you've done and figure out what works and what doesn't and how to make what's on the page better match what's in your head, then you will get better. And there's no time limit on any of this, so there's always going to be a next time if you want there to be.

If you just want to write for yourself, then no worries, have at it and enjoy it. But it sounds like you don't just want to write, you also want to be read. Far as I've seen, most writers do. And I understand feeling like what you've written is something you wouldn't show to anyone, and how discouraging that can be. Wanting to get better is good - if you start off thinking your work is incredible, odds are really good it's horrible. Feeling like you suck at writing is a big step toward getting better, since the only way to get better is to learn where you need to improve. So congrats, you're doing it right.

I also hear you on throwing away your work if you don't think it's up to your standards. To put it simply again: stop that. One of the biggest ways to get better is to edit what you've already done, to see what you did and figure out what works and what doesn't and make the changes to make it what you want it to be. And you can't do that if you delete everything you write because you think it sucks. Also, it might not suck! It's really damn easy to stop in the middle of a page or a paragraph or a sentence and say "fuck it all", but sometimes you go back to your work and find that it's not as bad as you thought.

Also: what's in your head will never perfectly match what you put on the page. This is another thing I've seen a ton of writers talk about. It's really easy to have an amazing idea, and when you try to write it out, it feels like a jumbled clusterfuck and all the awesome that got you to start writing it is nowhere to be found. That's normal. That's first draft stuff. In a case like that, the best you can do is go over your work and make the changes you need to bring it closer to what you first thought up. Nothing comes out perfect the first time, but you have to get it on the page before you can make it better. You can fix shit writing, you can't fix writing that doesn't exist.

Not sure what else to say, but I hope this helps. And one more thing:
View attachment 7332

Good luck.

Wow. I'm honestly... Sort of lost for words. Thank you so much for taking the time to respond. You have no idea how helpful all of this is to see, if anything it's encouraging me to keep trying and I think that's the most important thing. I'll definitely be saving all of this so that I can read it whenever I start feeling crap about my work - and again, I really appreciate it. Thank you so much.

 

[Slab Bulkhead]

 

[Evil]

One thing I have learned?

Writing is a skill. And like all skills, it requires practice. You need to practice. You need to challenge yourself and get outside of your comfort zone.

Try different writing exercises, learn skills in brevity and composition.

Try Drabbles, be it the 100 word or the 10 minute exercises. With the former, you have to write a scene in exactly 100 words, no more no less. With the latter, you set an alarm for 10 minutes and you write until the alarm goes off.

Or work on something different. I mean radically different. But just write.

Find a quiet place to work, hopefully one free from distractions, and just write.

* * *
Look, I get it. I've been there, I think every writer has been there. There's that little bastard of a beast on your shoulder, whispering doubt and failure in your ear as you write. You'll never be rid of it, the best you can hope for is to just rise above and ignore it. At the end of the day, nothing any of us will ever say will be what actually helps. That's going to solely be on you. You are the only one who can pull yourself up by the bootstraps. And writing will be a way to do that. Several years back, I wrote what was effectively a novel to do that, after I lost a close family member and several friends in quick succession. Everything I felt, I pour into that story. And I learned a few things as I wrote. And as I wrote, my writing improved. I mean, yeah, I stay well away from that story because I don't like the writing style that I used then, but every writer feels that.

Sometimes your life is going to take a knock and you're not going to be able to write what you want there and then. That's okay. Keep the creative juices going and work on something else until you feel confident enough to get back to that point. I have three smallish projects I want to do for TiTS, but due to certain events happening I haven't found the will to work on them. But I have been able to create a superhero setting with worldbuilding for several key locations, a brief timeline for the last 150 years or so of the setting and several dozen characters. But I'm still nowhere near a point where I feel confident about writing something like TiTS.

If you consider yourself a writer, you have a story to tell. You are telling the story not for others, but for yourself. You're only sharing it with others. So if you're brave enough to ask for help, maybe you're brave enough to take that first step and write for yourself.

 

[Nephilim_Anunnaki]

Well, I am (creative like speaking) blocked for years now.

 

[Stemwinder]

People have this odd notion that writing should be easier than something like drawing, as if being able to string some words together is all it really takes.

When you sit down to do it you discover that putting some real creative writing together gives you the same realization that drawing your first lines does: all of your fundamentals are rough and getting better is going to be a long haul.

Most "writer's block" is either people realizing that it's going to take a lot more work and practice than they thought or that their ideas were half-baked. Writing takes practice and dedication and so does being able to come up with ideas that lead to further ideas. Those who don't want to work at it quickly find out that they're not cut out for it. The block is the feeling of standing at the bottom of a wall that feels unscalable.

 

[BasedBuckNasty]

Go fuck with people in real life. Like, go scout out some Gamestops for cute grills or something. Now hold the fuck up with that anxiety attack nonsense. I didn't say hit on the cute grills okay! No. You go into that gamestop and find all the ecchi, harem, and just borderline H games you possibly can. Then you take that fucking stack to her register and make her go through every single one of them whilst you stare her in the eye. Say something, I FUCKING DARE YOU! DO IT! You get bonus points if during your search she comes and asks you if you need assistance. To which you should politely explain that you have a burning waifu itch to scratch. You got it bad. Real bad. I am quite sure this will 100% help you in your future endeavors. Believe me!

On the flip side, being constantly creative usually leads people to believe you are high on some form of narcotics 24/7, dunno why.

 

[Stemwinder]

If I had the power to kill one cliche I think it'd be the old 'wow, what was that guy smoking?'.

 

[Grimoire]

hello, while i may not have the same responses with much swearing or referential novelties as some i do have some of the same issues. If you would like my take on the topic then by all means take this with a grain of salt as some of this will be difficult to swallow as it is a hard truth but by no means to take it as an offence or a point to dissuade you from writing. Quite the opposite!

Seven years ago, just a college student trying their hand in writing smut (in context, i've written other things but smut not being one of them) to which i had no clue what that even meant. Publicly, I can't stand people nor interact with them so being a hermit is just the way i am by nature. When i DO interact with people, it is usually because i need something or because i have no other option (whatever the case may be for you, try to adapt) however there have been time when i make a genuine attempt to learn more about various topics and make it a point to become a scholar about it. Finding the topic you are so passionate about is something you need to find and give the finger to your insecurities and just keep going until you can't stomach the feeling anymore like: keep writing until you know you can't keep going. Forget the editing, the cliches, the comma splitting errors, the inconsistencies ... you need to keep your mind focused at keeping your fingers preoccupied just as i'm doing. It helps to have specific people to confide in and learn what you can to adapt your preferences and writing style to the idea that you have in mind. For example: First-Person Perspective and Third-Person Perspective narrating have been my bread and butter in writing but i know nothing about writing in the Second-Person Perspective (pathetic, i know, stop judging me!) which was a challenge for me to learn.

So i know nothing about "Smut" or "Second-Person" narrative writing, but i can keep writing. Here's where the anxiety and writer's block comes into play for ME:

I have no clue where to start or where this will end, i can use what i know but i have no way of making it work in my mind that would be appropriate, i have a target audience in mind but i'm scared to even broadcast to the world that i have absolutely no idea what i am doing and there for attempt to eat my paperback journals and swallow the evidence as quickly as humanely possible to eliminate all traces of my failure (i'm still butthurt when i was successful). In my mind i can't write, I turned off and tried to forget that i even attempted to try and write something that I am unfamiliar with and i was heartbroken because i want to be a good writer and i want my work to be good enough to show people. The truth is stranger than fiction: "You are the greatest evil and utmost cruelest critic out of everyone in the WORLD!"

Does that sound like someone? Do you think for one second that you are the only person that feels like that? No, you're not. Even the most prolific writers gets cold feet, even cold feet while still dealing with a crappy hand life had dealt them just to get away from it all. Patience is half the battle, but it's more than just the nerves talking, it's the notion that you CANNOT do it. You can't write something, you won't do it. You can't stay still long enough to do it, so you won't. Keep telling yourself that you won't and then it become true for you because you've convince yourself that you can't.

"This is taking to long", you tell yourself, "maybe i'll just put this away for another day and just come back when i think of something" but you'll just keep getting the writer's block, procrastinate our way into a slump until you forgot what you even did for it and eventually forget what was your mindset you had in mind for it and erase all your work to start on a new idea. It is a typical feeling but the feeling isn't mutual. Don't think of it as a way of giving up or shelving it, take it as a challenge! Tell yourself that you have to keep going, make up something to keep your thoughts going just to keep the thought clear in your idea. Instead of just doing 20,000 words for an event submission to be minimal go for 5,000 more! You think a character's personality is flat? Write a persona that will knock the shoes off the reader! You got an idea to expand but remembered about a spelling error 14 pages ago, forget it, just keep going!

If you have no thoughts about where to proceed to, just think of what does your work need? What could give your story more depth, more interest to reel readers in, what could be fun about an encounter? But most of all, write what is it that YOU want and really like. If you can't get off on your own smut, then what's the point? It wouldn't be fun to write smut if you can't jerk-off to it, it would be a chore! We never want to do chores so why the heck would you make your hobby (abet a very very naughty and cum-stained hobby to boot) like one in the first place? Just do what you want to do and forget what anyone else says or thinks about it, it's your work. Now i'm not saying you shouldn't critique your work (God knows i need to find those errors, fuck me for THAT!!) but you will need to keep in mind that you are your worst critic not the people you will be showing it off to, no no!

Because you feel that your work is sufficient, you get lazy; if you think it need more work, you will make it too hard for yourself. A true genius and a confident writer always strikes a balance between the two hells! I found that if i'm too critically for my work but i feel that if i tweeked just a few more things, that it will be good to get some appraisal of my work to see if someone else's input would help me determine if it needs something else. Most often, my work can be awe inspiring and (aside from the comma-splitting) enjoyable! So don't beat yourself too much if you have too little to present, come back to it when your idea springs up new fruitful expansions but not too long that you forget or it's the slump you will return to!

I do hope you find some of this helpful to you.