[WIP] Raye, Whore Catboy at Beth's (+follower)

ds6

Active Member
Mar 30, 2017
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Hello all, a good while ago ago I started writing a character, a cute catboy (not Kathrit) named Raye. The character and document have been progressing nicely, but the time it has taken and the size of the document have both been larger than expected.

Here is the doc. Be as critical as you like. I am fully open to suggestions in the writing and general character design of Raye, scene additions, editing, and anything else anyone feels like mentioning. Any and all help in getting this thing done is appreciated, as it has grown into quite a large project.

For some backstory, I have previous writing experience and most of it comes pretty naturally; however, this is my first time writing smut. I'm surprised at how easy it's been to make the transition. I hope what I have so far is of acceptable quality, as this is also my first time really sharing my writing work to anything more than colleagues.

I would be lying if Raye wasn't just a mash of my own personal fetishes, but I am trying and planning to make any weird shit optional. Time will tell.

Full disclosure, I would also be lying if I said I wasn't at least partially inspired by Lithier's game and his own cute cat character he's written; I never intended for this project to actually come to fruition, so I didn't worry about the fact that they were at a base level similar characters. Raye has diversified nicely as I continue to write and go back over older scenes, and he never was intended to be a direct copy anyway, so I hope by sharing this I don't step on any toes. I just wanted to write something fun and cute, and that game contains some of my favorite erotic literature to date. Consider it a homage.

Furthermore, Raye is written as a sub and with a PC dom, but not super BDSM dom. More of a owner/pet relationship than anything, I guess. Much of the writing is very lovey-dommy since that's what I'm into, especially for treated males who get a lot of special treatment (ha). I plan to branch out a bit though to cater to different playstyles; I know I hate it when my Steele reacts to a situation completely unnaturally, breaking immersion. However, cock size will still play a large role in how Raye treats you and what you can do with him. He doesn't really like tiny-cocked guys or women, but I've began support for hardlight, and I might try some other things. I may write some dommy vag scenes where he fucks the PC after you get to know him well, but that's about as far as I'm willing for the time being.

If things go well, I would also like to take a shot at coding Raye myself, or at least pitch in to it. Gives me a reason to learn AS and Flash.

Thanks for reading.
 
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NotYouNorI

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Aug 26, 2015
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First off, get is on a google doc make it more clear where one scene ends and another begins.
 
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ds6

Active Member
Mar 30, 2017
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I know, and as the scenes grew so did the confusion of where anything is. Linking will help. I should have waited to post but I have been putting it off consistently. Kinda terrifying, you know?

For the most part double newlines denote the end of a scene unless noted.
 
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NotYouNorI

Well-Known Member
Aug 26, 2015
2,269
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I know, and as the scenes grew so did the confusion of where anything is. Linking will help. I should have waited to post but I have been putting it off consistently. Kinda terrifying, you know?

For the most part double newlines denote the end of a scene unless noted.

Just put it on a Gdoc. it'll allow for better organisation.
 

ds6

Active Member
Mar 30, 2017
25
8
Just put it on a Gdoc. it'll allow for better organisation.
Already said I will in the OP, probably by tomorrow if I have time.

Like I said I posted this to help me actually move to the next step in this process, else I never would. Now I'm accountable, I have to do it. Even if I really don't.
 
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Ormael

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Aug 27, 2015
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Keep it up new person. Since you managed to win with your own laziness to post it the next step(s) in making it toward succesful submission should be only getting easier. Just breace yourself for quite possible wave of critique.
 
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TheDevilYouKnow

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Oct 21, 2015
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You could always write the scenes without parser calls and just get some help from editors later on. There are plenty of people that will do it for free and Gdocs make it really easy.

Also, here's the public repo link.
 
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Noob Salad

Captain Shitpost
Aug 26, 2015
4,374
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Catboys are gross.

But you do you.
 
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Ormael

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Aug 27, 2015
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We still lack many catboys/girls to make it even with puppyboys/girls. Umm when I think about it even puppyboys are not so many compared to the puppygirls...
 

ds6

Active Member
Mar 30, 2017
25
8
You could always write the scenes without parser calls and just get some help from editors later on.
Yeah, I did some lurking to check out how things worked around here, and once I get it set up for proper editing I would be fine with anyone pitching in. Think of this as a preliminary viewing/placeholder until I really open shop.
I would still like to take this opportunity as a learning experience, ex. to see how the parser works in general, because like I said I'd like to try coding it myself. I've been meaning to learn AS and it'd be nice to do so before Flash becomes completely obsolete.
Also, here's the public repo link.
Thanks!

Catboys are gross.
u

We still lack many catboys/girls to make it even with puppyboys/girls.
That's part of the reason I decided to do it too, lack of kitties.
I read there might be an Ausar boy in the works...
 
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Noob Salad

Captain Shitpost
Aug 26, 2015
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I've always wanted a sub character in TiTS that you could give a sub character to.

Giving a pet to my pet is my jam. But I have a buddy who's an expert on pets so let's see what he thinks.
 

ds6

Active Member
Mar 30, 2017
25
8
I've always wanted a sub character in TiTS that you could give a sub character to.

Giving pets to your pets is my jam. But I have a buddy who's an expert on pets so let's see what he thinks.
I could totally try to work in Sera, it would fit her personality. I was throwing that idea around anyway. @HugsAlright would be a pretty alright guy to go to for extending it or coming up with other ideas. I'm not so good at writing actual master/mistress type stuff because it is not entirely my jam, but I could giver 'er the old college try.

If you haven't read, crew interaction is high on my list, because I always felt crew didn't really interact at all and it felt unnatural.

Check out the crew interactions I wrote (search for "Let's go:" to jump to where it starts), had some fun with those. Not entirely sure they're all in character tho.
 
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ds6

Active Member
Mar 30, 2017
25
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Congratulations, you win a prize for the first false-positive the antispam shit caught. (I have no idea why, but :themoreyouknow: )
I figure it was the age of the account and the GitHub link in the quote.

momma always telled me I was special, words
 

Gedan

BUTTS BUTTS BUTTS
Staff member
Aug 26, 2015
8,008,896
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Nah it wasn't even the post with the link it complained about. It was the one before it. :iiam:
 

ds6

Active Member
Mar 30, 2017
25
8
So I make a fucking Google account. I go to log in to do some shit and I get this.
v5pVM.png

god jesus raptor baby christ I don't WANT you to verify anything you worthless cunt I am a grown ass man capable of handling my own shit

I'm traveling cross-country right now so I assume this is because I am using the hotel wifi, but I used fucking data and it didn't complain, but now I can't even log in that way.

So I might have just lost all my work (including some new scenes) unless someone has a remedy. Fuck cloud shit it doesn't fucking work. I never used or trusted it and now look what happened to my first Google account in like five years.

 
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Gedan

BUTTS BUTTS BUTTS
Staff member
Aug 26, 2015
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I will admit I've toyed with the idea of finding and self-hosting a gdocs replacement expressly for our use, mainly to avoid potential shenanigans with people reporting content and getting it blackholed (paging @Savin) or having no way to recover work from someones account if the need arises.
 

Lord Lodestar

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Sep 24, 2016
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A few questions:
1) Is the White Metabolism fill amount meant to decrease over time, or does he pretty much stay at maximum plushness once you've filled him up?
2) The WM Color corresponds to PC's cum color, I'd assume?
3) You ever think about Amazon Treated blurbs? If not, it isn't a big deal, but it'd be nice if the variant got a little more mention.
 
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ds6

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Mar 30, 2017
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A few questions:
1) Is the White Metabolism fill amount meant to decrease over time, or does he pretty much stay at maximum plushness once you've filled him up?
there are two values, the fill value is how much he has inside him at one time and does decrease over time (like Emmy), and the overall wm value is how much it has permanently affected him. I wasn't sure about some way to allow it to be decreased or maybe to decrease over time, I'm open to suggestions.
2) The WM Color corresponds to PC's cum color, I'd assume?
as stated yes, but it can be changed over time if yours changed too.
3) You ever think about Amazon Treated blurbs? If not, it isn't a big deal, but it'd be nice if the variant got a little more mention.
yes, but I wanted to get the basic scenes done before branching off to others, since I imagine there would be a bit of reuse. I should also convert it (again) to the expected format beforehand to make it easier on potential editors.

On the topic of Google being shit,
v6hdT.png

good :-DDD

I guess I'll just redo it.

EDIT: made a new account and before even beginning I try to share it, now this:
v6jQ2.png

I am very anger.

EDIT: fixed
 
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ds6

Active Member
Mar 30, 2017
25
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I didn't get as much done as I'd wanted, nowhere near what I had before. I did at least expand on a few sections and add a few more I didn't have before. It should be much more readable now compared to the text doc. I am still adjusting the flow of the document and converting the statements to the right format, but otherwise I am open to any comments on my writing style :). I've also updated the OP for readability and put the gdocs link there.
Time for another 6 hour drive wooooooooo
 
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ds6

Active Member
Mar 30, 2017
25
8
So I'm still without home (I didn't fully explain but I'm moving to a new state cross-country and am bunking at a friend's place) but I had a chance to work on the document; it's actually pretty readable now except for the Appearance, Talk, and a handful of pluggable scenes I have yet to update. I also updated the OP to better streamline my excessive word vomit into actual cohesive thoughts.

I'd say the document is about 1/3rd or 2/5ths done, not including any extra scenes I end up adding. 70ish pages so far... Word vomit, huh?
 

SoAndSo

Scientist
Creator
Mar 26, 2017
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Well it says 59 in the doc.

but only 1/3 done? Jeebus, frend, give Ranma a break.
 

ds6

Active Member
Mar 30, 2017
25
8
Well it says 59 in the doc.

but only 1/3 done? Jeebus, frend, give Ranma a break.
On my resolution at least if that makes a difference, I'm seeing 67...

I can only work so fast lad! I got shit to do, like unpacking sofas.

edit: I worked on it today and I'm about 2/3 and change done with what I shall call the initial editing pass, since I've also added new scenes and updated other things as I have been reformatting to the improved syntax.
 
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Roast_chicken

Well-Known Member
Mar 14, 2017
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yo! just checking in on this thread. I love what this character has going on! Has this project been put on hiatus, or are things still being put in order at home? Again, just wondering of this project is still alive at the moment. While I suck at writing, I could definitely review and proofread anything you post/ send me