Succubi Milk

[Synea]

This is my first attempt at demon transformations for succubi milk and incubi draft. The items would be useful as monster loot for any imps/demons.
This is my first submission, so please help me out with any parser trouble. For example I am not sure when exactly the TF stats changes happen, and the refers to the updated bodypart description.
The wings tag also does not seem to work in the parser.

Google docs:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yB7CCYiqOvIs41rwzT8T98fijQdyvTWephE529anMi4/edit#

 

[Dark67titan]

I apologise for the harshness but there is no way that this is going to be accepted what so ever with out massive changes as you haven’t even thought about the alchemy system or how it would fit the lore of CoC2 , not only that but this feels like it was copied and pasted from the OG CoC ,anyone else that’s been here a while will tell you the same thing and this is just the surface problems.

 

[Synea]

I apologise for the harshness but there is no way that this is going to be accepted what so ever with out massive changes as you haven’t even thought about the alchemy system or how it would fit the lore of CoC2 , not only that but this feels like it was copied and pasted from the OG CoC ,anyone else that’s been here a while will tell you the same thing and this is just the surface problems.

Could you please elaborate? I don't know the exact submission format, but each transformation only affects one specific body region, so I don't understand how it conflicts with the alchemy system.
As for the lore, yes, it is closely held to the CoC1 version, the intention was to bring a demonic TF to CoC2. I don't see why any imps/Kasyrra and anyone related to her should not have some demonic item. If you have any lore specific objections, please tell me, I'd appreciate any help.

 

[Dark67titan]

Could you please elaborate? I don't know the exact submission format, but each transformation only affects one specific body region, so I don't understand how it conflicts with the alchemy system.
As for the lore, yes, it is closely held to the CoC1 version, the intention was to bring a demonic TF to CoC2. I don't see why any imps/Kasyrra and anyone related to her should not have some demonic item. If you have any lore specific objections, please tell me, I'd appreciate any help.

for the lore side of things kass has only been in this world a week so how would this sort of tf be easily available this early in game and as far as we’re aware kass is the only demon in the world so it would have to come directly from her and I doubt she’s gone on hooked her self up to a milker. For the writing it feels like it’s been completely plagerised from CoC1 with no originality.

 

[Balaknightfang]

Could you please elaborate? I don't know the exact submission format, but each transformation only affects one specific body region, so I don't understand how it conflicts with the alchemy system.
As for the lore, yes, it is closely held to the CoC1 version, the intention was to bring a demonic TF to CoC2. I don't see why any imps/Kasyrra and anyone related to her should not have some demonic item. If you have any lore specific objections, please tell me, I'd appreciate any help.

Ok, so, to hopefully provide some clarity:
This TF would likely be seen some time around lvl 5, which is a fair ways down the road. I disagree with the idea that this isn't necessarily lore friendly, as we'll probably have a demon TF at some point. However, due to the nature of TFs in CoC2, it will more than likely be an all-encompassing TF that does both succubi and incubi, instead of separate TFs for each.

Regarding the formatting of the doc and TF itself, I highly recommend taking a look at the other TF docs, especially GothPastel's Brute Beets doc due to its comprehensive nature and to get some exposure to how these should be formatted. From the quick glance I got to take at the doc, you seem to have a decent understanding of parser usage, your main issue seemed to be a mix of seeming like it was otherwise copy-pasted and formatting issues.

 

[Synea]

My idea was to keep it two items to allow a choice to which gender the TF pulls you, since this is the one thing the Alchemy system does not restrict to my knowledge, and as a guy you should not be locked to incubus, or as a girl to succubus transformations, especially since COC2 should give you more control and less spamming to get to your desired look.

As for the demon lore, to my knowledge, Kasyrra is just the first demon, there is no ban on her corrupting other people to demons. If she had time to corrupt an alraune, an elf princess + breed a bunch of imps, she will also have found time for getting herself one or two hench-demons.
I have some vague ideas floating around for a recurring enemy encounter with a demon that was corrupted by Kasyrra, but I'd rather polish up this first before starting a larger project.

 

[BubbleLord]

My idea was to keep it two items to allow a choice to which gender the TF pulls you, since this is the one thing the Alchemy system does not restrict to my knowledge, and as a guy you should not be locked to incubus, or as a girl to succubus transformations, especially since COC2 should give you more control and less spamming to get to your desired look.

As for the demon lore, to my knowledge, Kasyrra is just the first demon, there is no ban on her corrupting other people to demons. If she had time to corrupt an alraune, an elf princess + breed a bunch of imps, she will also have found time for that.
I have some vague ideas floating around for a recurring enemy encounter with a demon that was corrupted by Kasyrra, but I'd rather polish up this first before starting a larger project.

I'd recommend you join the Discord and speak to the writers/CoC2 folks too if you're looking to do something like that. That seems to be the main issue; this is something that definitely needs some guidance to align into the game and AFAIK no one has spoken with you. The overall consensus was that this was lifted from the prior games (which so far hasn't really been done for any of the TFs barring the concepts/names of the eggs).

If you're interested in writing, I really encourage you to communicate with other writers rather than bulldoze ahead on a demon TF which - as pointed out - will not/should not be available anytime soon within the current or even upcoming areas of the game for a very long time.

 

[Synea]

I didn't know discord was the main platform for writers discussions, I hoped for some feedback here. I saw discord mentioned at some point but did not find a link to it. I only just found that it is linked on the main page (facepalm)
In any case, the TF options are definitely inspired by the original versions, but the descriptions are all newly written.

 

[BubbleLord]

I didn't know discord was the main platform for writers discussions, I hoped for some feedback here. I saw discord mentioned at some point but did not find a link to it. I only just found that it is linked on the main page (facepalm)
In any case, the TF options are definitely inspired by the original versions, but the descriptions are all newly written.

Writers can do suggestions and might post here but it's generally super easy to talk/reach most of the writers/people making CoC2 on Discord.

 

[Synea]

I sorted the document by affected body parts, and tried to standardize it with other TF documents. I would appreciate any further comments.