[Submitted] Tessa, The White Woman.

Fr0sty

Well-Known Member
Dec 4, 2017
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Hello there!

A few weeks ago, I started work on a character and was sharing my progress over in the "Ideas" sub-forum. About a week ago I finished up everything I wanted to do with the character (for now), and let it sit for a bit. While it is "done", I still think it might need a bit of fine tuning and perhaps a tad bit of cleaning up. Either way, here she is.

Tessa: https://docs.google.com/document/d/...S-VSJK3Xx59T7AKXQ/edit#heading=h.edfs35htk8pe

Any feed back, criticisms or suggestions are welcomed. :)

I'm hoping to submit her in a month or two, once I feel like I've done everything I can with it to make her as polished as possible.
 

Nnxx

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Feb 3, 2017
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That's pretty good, I do enjoy NPCs where you can't just go say hi and get some sexy time
 

wallpaper

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Nov 29, 2017
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I'm wondering if you can give the player the option to back off when she asks, instead of pushing the issue? Then you can catch her later after a first intro if you like?
 

Alabaster Chimes

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Aug 29, 2015
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Really nice work here man.

Like no. Really. I cant put my finger on it, but I like her a lot, I want to see more of her and I hope there's still more for you to show us.
 

Fr0sty

Well-Known Member
Dec 4, 2017
83
101
I'm wondering if you can give the player the option to back off when she asks, instead of pushing the issue? Then you can catch her later after a first intro if you like?

Maybe. Worth thinking about at least.

Really nice work here man.

Like no. Really. I cant put my finger on it, but I like her a lot, I want to see more of her and I hope there's still more for you to show us.

Thanks, I'm glad people seem to like her. I have more stuff for her in my head, but I'd rather get a smaller and simple version of her done and out there. In the mean time I'll polish my skills and such before I tack on more content that could at bare minimum double her size. Assuming she even makes it into the game at all.
 

Lkynmbr24

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Oct 30, 2016
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Liking this gal so far. Not enough women in TiTS that just outright reject the good ol' Steele charm from the get-go. Definitely needs more of this! Might drop by the doc for some more detailed edits if/when I get the chance to since I'm pretty interested, but good stuff so far!

Also love the sense play! A little masochistic for my tastes personally, but it's definitely tame enough to still be hot and enjoyable, and actually inspires me to wanna make some sense play similar to this!
 

Libelous

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Aug 2, 2016
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Really really loving Tessa, love the hard/cold attitude that sticks throughout. The jokes and humors are really good and makes me love her even more. Definitely looking forward for more.

Oooooo and that saucy Sense Play. Supremely hot
 

Xeivous

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Sep 21, 2015
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Read a bit of it and tossed in a comment. Haven't gotten thru the sex scenes yet tho. This girl seems like fun
 

Miakoda

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Nov 4, 2017
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Somewhere Somehow
forum.fenoxo.com
I haven't read all that much yet, but I gotta say, I'm already liking her. She sounds like someone who could be a whole lot of fun to interact with, more so once you've earned enough trust to get into her panties. I left a few comments, which I hope will help you on your way.
 

Fr0sty

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Dec 4, 2017
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It's awesome to hear people are liking it so far, and the feedback and corrections people have been giving me has been great help. :)
 

Fr0sty

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Dec 4, 2017
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Huge shoutout to @Libelous who's been catching all my horrible grammar mistakes, and been a huge help fine tune other stuff in the Doc.

You're awesome! :D
 
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Miakoda

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Nov 4, 2017
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It's awesome to hear people are liking it so far, and the feedback and corrections people have been giving me has been great help. :)
Really excited to see where things are headed with Tessa. Here's me crossing my fingers this makes it into the game
 

Fr0sty

Well-Known Member
Dec 4, 2017
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Really excited to see where things are headed with Tessa. Here's me crossing my fingers this makes it into the game

I really hope they like and want to include her. If they reject it, I'd likely try to retool her a bit and resubmit with changes they suggest, so long as whatever they dislike is something fixable.
 

Fr0sty

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Dec 4, 2017
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Well. Tessa's main editing seems to be done thanks to the efforts of a bunch of cool people (You know who you are). There may still be a few things in there that are wonky, but hopefully I will catch them when I do a big long sit read through in a day or two.

The Doc is still a bit incomplete, I still don't even have a planet picked out for her to be on yet, but I'm leaning towards Tarkus. If anybody has any suggestions about that, or notices something the Doc is missing as a whole lemme know :)

Otherwise I'm going to submit by the end of the month.
 

Miakoda

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Nov 4, 2017
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Otherwise I'm going to submit by the end of the month.
Holy shit, that was fast! I've been working since mid-November and I'm just over 1/3 doen with my content.

Then again, if everything goes right, that means Tessa'll be in the game quicker...
 

Fr0sty

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Dec 4, 2017
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Holy shit, that was fast! I've been working since mid-November and I'm just over 1/3 doen with my content.

Then again, if everything goes right, that means Tessa'll be in the game quicker...

Well, I intentionally held back/cut a big chunk of content that would have doubled her size at least. I opted that a smaller entry had a better chance to get in, esspcially if it was polished and well done. If Tessa gets in the game I'm going to resume work on that and think of it as an xpack. The extra content would have taken me A LOT longer, and I'd likely be chipping away at her for month. I have about 10 pages of it done, but I've decided to not touch it again until Tessa gets in.
 

Miakoda

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Nov 4, 2017
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Somewhere Somehow
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Man, I wish I had that much common sense. Here's me, immediately engaging in a 100+ page project right off of the bat because I can't keep my imagination in check...
 

Ethereal Dragon

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Aug 28, 2015
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Man, I wish I had that much common sense. Here's me, immediately engaging in a 100+ page project right off of the bat because I can't keep my imagination in check...
lol thats why we have guides and advise for writers who wanna write for TiTS, don't bite off more than you can chew ;)
 

Miakoda

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Nov 4, 2017
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Somewhere Somehow
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lol thats why we have guides and advise for writers who wanna write for TiTS, don't bite off more than you can chew ;)
Oh it's not that I can't chew it, it's just that I'll probably burn myself out for a little while right after my first submission, which isn't really a fun time when you already have a list of ideas you'd like to work on. Which I do.

Besides, I love writing. And as I said, I have an overactive imagination that won't shut the fuck up! So yeah, I think I'll continue with Laethyr until he's done. I want to see him in the game, and I am determined to get him there!
 

Ethereal Dragon

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Aug 28, 2015
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Oh it's not that I can't chew it, it's just that I'll probably burn myself out for a little while right after my first submission, which isn't really a fun time when you already have a list of ideas you'd like to work on. Which I do.

Besides, I love writing. And as I said, I have an overactive imagination that won't shut the fuck up! So yeah, I think I'll continue with Laethyr until he's done. I want to see him in the game, and I am determined to get him there!

Sound advise from me would be to write it in baby steps that way you don't burn yourself out.
 

BitchBroken

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Dec 24, 2017
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Fuck it, lose your mind. The best stuff comes when you're consumed. Let yourself be possessed by the muse!! (said the demonic being on his left shoulder)
 
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Lkynmbr24

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Oct 30, 2016
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Screw the rules, I have ideas!

In seriousness though, sometimes it isn't a bad thing if you want to go all out for your first project, as long as you have the scope of mind to finish it and see it through to the end, and best of all, to have fun while doing it. It shouldn't ever feel like a chore.

@Night Trap and myself can attest to this, having done gigantic projects for our first rodeos... And hey, it worked out real well, at least for now! It's nice to distract yourself with something else every once in a while!
 

Fr0sty

Well-Known Member
Dec 4, 2017
83
101
Any plans to add full sex scenes (vaginal, anal, etc.?)

Not on character launch, but I do have some of that stuff planned for expansion content (if she even makes in into the game.)

I wanted the first time the PC would get those full sex scenes to be AFTER a rather lengthy event, make the player feel like they earned them.
 

Fr0sty

Well-Known Member
Dec 4, 2017
83
101
Why has nobody else mentioned this yet? Anyways the title Tessa, The White Woman makes it sound like she’s white as in Caucasian not a white scaled Ovir. She does have white scales right?

Yuppers, as well as her unscaled sections and hair. It's a moniker, and even though it can be taken literally I doubt people will get confused over it and think her hook is she's Caucasian. Her albinism is pretty much the first thing I play notes about her, so that should explain things fairly well.
 

XBoxMaster131

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Oct 18, 2016
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Why has nobody else mentioned this yet? Anyways the title Tessa, The White Woman makes it sound like she’s white as in Caucasian not a white scaled Ovir. She does have white scales right?

Yuppers, as well as her unscaled sections and hair. It's a moniker, and even though it can be taken literally I doubt people will get confused over it and think her hook is she's Caucasian. Her albinism is pretty much the first thing I play notes about her, so that should explain things fairly well.
Aagh, I'm trying to think of a bukkake joke, but I can't think of anything that won't cause resounding facepalms!