Titus Pants, space pirate; Character and associated adventure idea [feedback requested]

thebiggestD

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Titus Pants, space pirate and captain of "the Bloated Queen" star cruiser, an old fashioned gentlemen pirate from some no-name backwater approaches the PC in space while traveling between planets. He suggests a parley. Boarding with a Gabilani, his second in command, he greets any former pirates aboard friendly and flirts with any of the women. He smiles a flawless smile and gives off an aura of pure charisma.

Under his red captain's hat flow flaxen locks framing his roguishly handsome face and down his back nearly to his ankles which are held together with a simple red ribbon.
He wears a red captain's jacket and gloves to match his hat, but it is open far too wide to not have been tailored that way. His toned chest is thatched with a thin covering of blonde hair, accentuating his physique with a 'happy trail' leading down to his nether region. His pants are, in fact, very tight. They allow you to see the outline of his package and every ripple of his well-toned ass. His shaft is large and appears to be that of a regular human from this vantage point but, frankly, you thought it would be bigger given his name. His balls, however, seem to swell even as you look at them. The pants are tucked into a pair of well shined black boots.
He also wears a pair of holsters low on his hips, almost riding on his manhood, which are empty as a sign of respect to you, though he still wears an ornate sheathed sword on his right hip.

He introduces his Gabilani companion, whom was dressed much like his captain, "This is my second-in-command, the dread pirate 'Goldylocks'."

The little well-dressed Gabilani threw his golden curls over a shoulder chittering with pride.

"Excuse me?" You ask in surprise.

"He tells me that it is quite a fearsome title on his home world, and I just let it go." Titus says with a shrug before continuing in more hushed tones, " Is there somewhere more private in your ship than your airlock where we may speak?"

Your quarters are comfortable and private; if cozy. Titus reclines lazily on your bed seeming as natural on it as if it were his own, and his second-in-command actually lays down. At least the Gabilani had the manners to take off his boots.
 

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XBoxMaster131

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Oct 18, 2016
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Well now, this is a first! By that I mean someone coming in with pictures to back up their idea.

Do you intend on going full hog and writing this?
 

XBoxMaster131

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Oct 18, 2016
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My god... someone actually used the Ideas subforum in the way that it's intended!

I'm pretty sure this is the first time I've seen that happen! Usually it's just a catcher for morons who didn't read this or this.

Best of luck my dude! I can't wait to see what you make!
 
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thebiggestD

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Adventure synopsis:

Semi-retired space pirate, Titus Pants, finds himself at odds with his greatest enemies; the Neuterals, an anti-breeder terrorist group, who wish to, willingly or unwillingly, remove the ability of all creatures in the universe to breed. He wishes to enlist you into an infiltration mission where you will battle in space and inside their space fortress for the fate of the galaxy. Be sure to bring some estrobloom and dicksprout for extra fun.

Below:
Neuteral melee fighter, Neuteral blaster soldier, Neuteral defeat, Neuteral Space fortress
 

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thebiggestD

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Neuteral Minibosses

The Traggen is called Frank Whoreagain. 'He' is a heavy weapon fighter who hits like a truck but is weak to stunning.

The Modified Ausar has no name yet but is meant to be a high dodge and speed fighter with low defense.
 

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thebiggestD

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Yes, but not directly. He's more of the original influence or initial catalyst than a driving force.
 
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thebiggestD

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Neuterals base map
 

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XBoxMaster131

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Oh fuck me you're going to infinity and beyond with this.

It's about damn time someone got in here who's willing to put in this much effort!
 
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thebiggestD

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Level 0- Holding Cells
1. Maintenance Hatch
2. a. Southern Cell A
b. Storage Closet- where the hatch dumps out the group
c. Southern Cell B
3. a. Western Cell A
b. Cell Block A Corridor
c. Guard Station
d. Cell Block B Corridor
e. Western Cell B
4. a. Northern Cell A
b. Cell Block Entryway [requires key] and teleport station
c. Northern Cell B
5. Stairs to next level

Level 1- Crew Quarters and labs
1. Stairways down
2. a. Armory
b. Corridor
c. Crew Lounge
d. Crew Quarters
3. a. Subject and Scientist Holding area
b. Brainwashing Station, Research area, and testing area
c. Corridor
d. Officer's Quarters
4. Stairway up

Level 2- Flight Deck
1. Stairway Down
2. Ship Controls/ Cockpit
3. Captain's Ready Room
 

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thebiggestD

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NPC encounter
Dr. Eugene Farmsworth
New Texan, 6'2" 180 lbs.
A currently blind and frail old man long retired from work as a doctor and scientist. As a scientist he was one of the people working on an earlier, unsuccessful, version of "the Treatment" now a staple of the New Texan culture. He has a large frame gone to seed over the years and were it not for the hump that has developed at his advanced age he would stand much taller than his admirable six foot two inches. He has a petite female terran woman who works as his eyes and hands.

(when PC enters the room)

An elderly New Texan man turns vaguely towards the door and proclaims, "Good news everyone! We're NOT going to die."

[Who are you?]


"I'm Doctor Eugene Farmsworth." He says proudly staring somewhere to your right, "I've been tampering with genetics since before you were any. Hell, since before your father was either.

Have you heard of 'the Treatment'? Well, that was partially based on my research; not that they'd ever admit to it. My original design called for four breasts and two asses. Its the two asses that tie the whole design together, but they called me a madman. The philistines."

[What are you doing here?]


He defiantly looks over your shoulder.

"My assistants and I were captured by this horrible anti-breeder group and forced to develop a hypnotic agent which would take away the genitals of the targeted creature as well as prime their mind for suggestions. Our current formula is nearly 100% effective with minimal side effects. I suggested that they should at least give the poor victim a second ass but they didn't take to the idea."

You stare at the old blind scientist in disbelief, asking, "Why would you do that?"

"Well, if the subject only has a single ass then they end up passing all of their waste through a single hole, not unlike a cloaca."

"No," You shake your head in disgust, "Why would you actually work with the Neuterals?"

He gestures wildly in your general direction, adjugated, as he begins in a loud voice, "What was I supposed to do? I'm an old man not some dashing hero from a story book, and the others have spent most of their lives behind test tubes and computer screens. We're not fighters. I did the best I could. I made sure the formula was as stable as possible, engineered it to cause a noticeable dip in intelligence, to keep my people safe, and we've been working on a formula to reverse the Neuteral process in secret.

It's all we could do."

[How were you captured?]


"She blinded me with SCIENCE!" Doctor Farmsworth says loudly thrusting a finger into the air, before continuing, "By which I mean she threw a flask into my eyes containing sulfuric acid; destroying them. After that I was as easy to manage as a new born kitten."

[Sex?]

Doctor Farmsworth looks incredulously somewhere to the left of you.

"As sure as I am that you'd be satisfied (if we could figure that whole thing out), I'm old. The best you're likely to get is some semen-colored dust."
 

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XBoxMaster131

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Oct 18, 2016
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NPC encounter
Dr. Eugene Farmsworth
New Texan, 6'2" 180 lbs.
A currently blind and frail old man long retired from work as a doctor and scientist. As a scientist he was one of the people working on an earlier, unsuccessful, version of "the Treatment" now a staple of the New Texan culture. He has a large frame gone to seed over the years and were it not for the hump that has developed at his advanced age he would stand much taller than his admirable six foot two inches. He has a petite female terran woman who works as his eyes and hands.

(when PC enters the room)

An elderly New Texan man turns vaguely towards the door and proclaims, "Good news everyone! We're NOT going to die."

[Who are you?]


"I'm Doctor Eugene Farmsworth." He says proudly staring somewhere to your right, "I've been tampering with genetics since before you were any. Hell, since before your father was either.

Have you heard of 'the Treatment'? Well, that was partially based on my research; not that they'd ever admit to it. My original design called for four breasts and two asses. Its the two asses that tie the whole design together, but they called me a madman. The philistines."

[What are you doing here?]


He defiantly looks over your shoulder.

"My assistants and I were captured by this horrible anti-breeder group and forced to develop a hypnotic agent which would take away the genitals of the targeted creature as well as prime their mind for suggestions. Our current formula is nearly 100% effective with minimal side effects. I suggested that they should at least give the poor victim a second ass but they didn't take to the idea."

You stare at the old blind scientist in disbelief, asking, "Why would you do that?"

"Well, if the subject only has a single ass then they end up passing all of their waste through a single hole, not unlike a cloaca."

"No," You shake your head in disgust, "Why would you actually work with the Neuterals?"

He gestures wildly in your general direction, adjugated, as he begins in a loud voice, "What was I supposed to do? I'm an old man not some dashing hero from a story book, and the others have spent most of their lives behind test tubes and computer screens. We're not fighters. I did the best I could. I made sure the formula was as stable as possible, engineered it to cause a noticeable dip in intelligence, to keep my people safe, and we've been working on a formula to reverse the Neuteral process in secret.

It's all we could do."

[How were you captured?]


"She blinded me with SCIENCE!" Doctor Farmsworth says loudly thrusting a finger into the air, before continuing, "By which I mean she threw a flask into my eyes containing sulfuric acid; destroying them. After that I was as easy to manage as a new born kitten."

[Sex?]

Doctor Farmsworth looks incredulously somewhere to the left of you.

"As sure as I am that you'd be satisfied (if we could figure that whole thing out), I'm old. The best you're likely to get is some semen-colored dust."
Sorry if this is rude of me to point out, but the formula for The Treatment is much, much older than this man could have been alive. Im talking like centuries old. So theres no way this guy could have been working on the og formula. Maybe you could change it so that instead he was looking into altering it? Big T has expressed serious interest in shifting the paradigm of New Texas, as well as the role and impact that the Treatment has in their society, so him funding a hush hush project to edit it so that people who take it arent as likely to be so ditzy is definately in the cards.

Also, if i may, maybe this could be a lead in to a multi-anus tf? thats just me spitballing though, sorry.
 
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thebiggestD

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Not rude at all. That’s exactly the kind of stuff this thread is for. I‘ll rework it towards that angle but I‘m also trying to push that he’s talking himself up so that it’s not surprising that no one has been talking about him up to this point.
i hadn’t thought about expanding the multi-anus comment into a full tf. I thought it was a funny little throwaway comment that calls back to the Dr. Mifisto character from early South Park, but I’ll think about it. Would it be side-by-side or stacked? What do you think?
 

TheShepard256

Well-Known Member
I'd say multi-anus would be the same as multi-arms: all scenes that reference them assume you only have the standard number, and there are way too many of those for adding in multi support retroactively to be worth the effort. Besides, having one anus right where it belongs is kind of a running in-joke for the community, and I'd hate to see it go.
 

XBoxMaster131

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Oct 18, 2016
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I'd say multi-anus would be the same as multi-arms: all scenes that reference them assume you only have the standard number, and there are way too many of those for adding in multi support retroactively to be worth the effort. Besides, having one anus right where it belongs is kind of a running in-joke for the community, and I'd hate to see it go.
Yeah thats true. Ah well.
 
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thebiggestD

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Your radio crackles to life as you are traveling through the void between stars:
"This is the Bloated Queen hailing [your ship name]" a smooth female voice says, "Captain Titus Pants requests a parlay with Captain Steele."

A blip appears on your nav/com as a massive modified military transport cruiser smoothly slips out of the cover of a nearby asteroid field. The blip then glitches out before stabilizing, now reading:
"The Bloated Queen
unregistered battle cruiser
Captain Titus Pants
Known pirate vessel"

The ship is now clearly visible as it begins its approach. The dark grey vessel is easily large enough to swallow a personal leisure ship or even a planet hopper in its prodigious cargo bay and still have room for all of the necessary crews. Along its belly are several rows of torpedo bays and two massive swivel guns. The ship lazily eats up the thousands of kilometers between your ships with its powerful engines and you can't help but wonder what 'the Bloated Queen' was in its former life.

Over the speakers the smooth female voice returns:
"This is the Bloated Queen hailing [your ship's name]. Captain Titus Pants requests a parlay with Captain Steele aboard your vessel. Please respond."

[Decline] [Attack] [Accept]
 

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