Hulio's Alley

[Ormael]

Every planet got merchant npc that can buy "anything" be it weapon, TF item or some illegal stuff. Well almost every planet since Tavros station not have such npc. Plus for so long in dust lay copleted codex for interesting race....Sionach. Made in almost forgoten past but still it's complete if one not count lack of npc's of this race. So without futher and probably boring intro here will leave all readers of this thread with link to gdoc. Oh right to not having short memory already here would thanks already now Fisto for looking over gdoc to try catch things I personaly not seen due to my "shortcomming". You was one hella huge help man, you're great ^^

Hulio's Alley

Comments, advices, suggestions and constructive critique in gdoc comments or here in thread appreciated.

 

[Lashcharge]

Why did you call him a totally human name? And who is Hulio?

I don't know if two room shops are allowed in tavros. Maybe if put in a corner so it doesn't occupy extra space.

Shame there are no sex scenes but that's okay.

Overall seems like good work but you need some editing.

 

[Kesil]

I've tried to edit it a little. Also, I concur with everything Lashchange said.

 

[Savin]

Why did you call him a totally human name?

This. Please change.

 

[Noob Salad]

Want to hear about my character, Bob the Human Terran?

 

[Ormael]

Why did you call him a totally human name? And who is Hulio?

I don't know if two room shops are allowed in tavros. Maybe if put in a corner so it doesn't occupy extra space.

Shame there are no sex scenes but that's okay.

Overall seems like good work but you need some editing.

Well that would be some remains of very first draft of whole idea so sionach owner name will change as soon I came with some fitting name, which probably will take few hours at worst. Does others names aside his and Hulio sounds out of the place to you? As for Hulio he "was" a human, which took a few TF and became less human-like looking. So his name sounding totaly human should be justified I think.

His shop is huge I mean reaaaaaly huge, which was reason to making two room. With just one it would look little weird with both lobby and warehouse descriptions.

No sex scenes is due to a quite simple reason. It's my first submission so I not wanna pack it too many things at once that would make it huge and heavy. I have plans for sex scenes but that need wait for a little later. Currently I wish for this gdoc content reach enough good quality to be worthy to be added to the game. And I aware it's still much work to do till that moment.

Want to hear about my character, Bob the Human Terran?

Dayum you never cease to amuse me with this iteligent jokes. For a moment I thought you wanted say Bob the Buider

PS. *Bows low* Thank you all for so far comments/edits and hoping for more pointers exchanges in the near future (and last words only those deep in the wuxia LN's would get the meaning ).

 

[NotYouNorI]

His shop is huge I mean reaaaaaly huge, which was reason to making two room. With just one it would look little weird with both lobby and warehouse descriptions.

Gene's shop on Myrellion is supposed to be huge too, since Gene himself is pretty big himself, a whole warehouse even, and yet it's one "room".

 

[Ormael]

Lots of stuff kept me busy for those 13 days away from working much on gdoc. Mostly I looked over all suggestions and cleaned up most aside few that required some rewriting of few parts of gdoc. Also I changed names that were pointed out as not fitting to some that I hope should be less fitting so I hope now noone will be displeased that those names are too plain or too similar to other names. So if someone still have any issues about some of the name I hope he/she will speak out it.


So in short I'm still alive, still slowly working on this gdoc (maybe not fast as I wish but I won't complain) and will keep working on this till it reach point it could be added to the game ^^

Gene's shop on Myrellion is supposed to be huge too, since Gene himself is pretty big himself, a whole warehouse even, and yet it's one "room".

That's up to each writter if they think shop should have one or more "rooms". And if you say that lobby and warehouse can be stuffed into one game room well that's your opinion and I not going to argue over it. As for me I feel it would be weird to have in one room ingame description of lobby and warehouse with all stuff talking how PC moving between those two places. And I not think size of shopkeeper have anything to do how many "rooms" his/her/it shop should have ingame.